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Ageis S. Pyro

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1Ageis S. Pyro Empty Ageis S. Pyro Thu Dec 03, 2015 5:02 pm

Ageis Pyro

Ageis Pyro
Enrollment Form

Ageis S. Pyro IMAGE HERE

Basic info
Name: Ageis Scyrus Pyro
Age: 19
Birthday: december 8th
Gender: Male
Race: Human
Height:
Weight:
Face Claim:

Stats
STR:5
DEF:4
RES:3
SPT:4
Aura 150|150 HP

Personality
Group: Gadgeteer
Likes: videogames, books, tinkering
Dislikes: jerks, tedious work, bugs
Fears: bugs, friends being hurt, losing control
Overall Personality: usually quiet, but enjoyable company when social. when alone, he can be found muttering to himself, reading, eating, fiddling with some mechanical thing, or somehow managing to do all of the above. he is quick to be friends, but not quick to trust, if someone says something that might be a lie, Ageis will have none of it. the friends he does trust, he will fight to the ends of the earth for. while being quite inteligent, he can't take a hint to save his life, hidden meanings or other non blunt forms of providing information will be lost on him unless he knows to look for something. while he likes to play videogames, he is nutoriously bad at them.

Abilities
Aura type: (See the Aura and Semblance Rules to know the types.)
Aura Color: always shifting between white and black, usually more white
Semblance: Gemeni, a semblance formed from an abnormal form of schitsophrenia. it allows the user to create a double that fights independantly from the user. unlike other copy based abilities, the double has a personality and fighting style seperate from the user. the double has an aura, but no hp, if the double's aura depletes, it vanishes.
Item 1: auroboras shotgun, a unique weapon with two sets of forms, paired with the shotgun is the longsword form. the shotgun can be split into a pair of pistols. the pistols can shift into a pair of knives. because of thew shift time between states, only one state can be used in combat at a time, heavy and slow, or light and fast.
Item 2: a tailored suit modified with additional protection and ammo storage. chainmail reinforced leather lining the whole of the suit, allowing for ease of movement with limited reduction in protective power.

History and Sample
History:

RP Sample:



Last edited by Ageis Pyro on Thu Dec 03, 2015 8:29 pm; edited 2 times in total (Reason for editing : repost)

2Ageis S. Pyro Empty Re: Ageis S. Pyro Sat Dec 05, 2015 12:46 am

Sno Lagu

Sno Lagu
There are a few mistakes with your character and I shall go in order to make it easy to find and fix. Take note that I first skimmed over it and saw these mistakes so I have yet to completely read your character but we might as well fix these first right?

Height- You didn't put a height

Weight- You left this blank as well

Face Claim- If you are unsure as to what that is well in the character code you should of seen at the beginning something that had brackets and then had the letters img in them and then there was some text that said something like "Character Image Here" That is your face claim it is what your character looks like. For example my characters face claim is an Utauloid named Sekka Yufu now if you don't know the name of your FC (face claim) or if your FC doesn't have a name at all then we ask that you link your FC at the Face Claim section.

Stats- You only have a limit of 12 stat points in total yet you seem to have about 16

Aura Type- You left this blank as well

Semblance- Your double can't have it's own aura and it can only sustain one hit before it dies and has to be re-summoned. Also having that double with a different personality would be like having a different person that you randomly summoned. It would basically look like you but it wouldn't be you which contradicts the part where you said it was a copy of you.

Item 1- Your weapon is a tier one weapon and thus can only have one form at the current time

History- Your history does not reach the 300 word count please add more to it

RP Sample- You typed this in a first person perspective when you should of used third person. Also you did not reach the 150 word count for the RP take note that all RP on the site has to be a minimum of 150 word. Please use this link https://wordcounter.net/ to check your word counts to make sure they are what the sight requires.

Other notes that kinda just bug me- There were a few misspellings for example "schitsophrenia" is spelled schizophrenia and "Gemeni" is spelled Gemini

This concludes my little skim though once you have fixed this then please bump your topic and I shall look over it a bit more detailed.

3Ageis S. Pyro Empty Re: Ageis S. Pyro Sat Mar 18, 2017 4:26 am

Akui

Akui
Hey there Ageis Pyro! It seems like this app has collected some dust (no, not that kind of dust, -.-). If you come back in about seven days and place the finishing touches, you're good to go. If not, I'll have to move this to the Inactive Section.

Sorry for any inconveniences.

http://www.discordapp.com/#5424

4Ageis S. Pyro Empty Re: Ageis S. Pyro Sun Apr 09, 2017 3:50 pm

Akui

Akui
I apologize, but due to there being no changes or response in much more than the allotted time, I must move this app to the Inactive Section.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

http://www.discordapp.com/#5424

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